Villa La Paz Newsletter June 2020
I Will Lend You A Child
I will lend you, for a little time,
Edgar Albert
A child of mine, He said.
For you to love the while he lives,
And mourn for when he’s dead.
It may be six or seven years,
Or twenty-two or three.
But will you, till I call him back,
Take care of him for Me?
He’ll bring his charms to gladden you,
And should his stay be brief.
You’ll have his lovely memories,
As solace for your grief.
I cannot promise he will stay,
Since all from earth return.
But there are lessons taught down there,
I want this child to learn.
I’ve looked the wide world over,
In search for teachers true.
And from the throngs that crowd life’s lanes,
I have selected you.
Now will you give him all your love,
Nor think the labor vain.
Nor hate me when I come
To take him home again?
I fancied that I heard them say,
‘Dear Lord, Thy will be done!’
For all the joys
Thy child shall bring,
The risk of grief we’ll run.
We’ll shelter him with tenderness,
We’ll love him while we may,
And for the happiness we’ve known,
Forever grateful stay.
But should the angels call for him,
Much sooner than we’ve planned.
We’ll brave the bitter grief that comes,
And try to understand
Jose Daniel came to us at the age of three years. He was born with a cleft lip and palate. The lip had been repaired shortly after birth but because of economic concerns the palate was still open. His mother had 5 other children and sold hard candy on buses and in the streets to make ends meet. She received no support from Jose’s father. Jose was an instant hit with the other children, employees and volunteers. He had a beguiling smile and loved to eat, scarfing down food before any of the other children had finished and marching to the kitchen to ask for more. Because the palate was open he did not speak which only added to his charm. The palate was repaired 6 months after he entered the home. The first attempt was incomplete and a second surgery was performed to definitively close the palate. Intensive speech therapy produced few results. Simple words such as “agua” (water) and “pan” (bread) were spoken in a whisper but no further progress was made. Being much loved and missed by his mother and siblings and seeing no progress with speech therapy his mother decided to take him home. Several months later his mother told us that he had been diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor. Surgery ensued but the tumor was so large it could only be partially removed. The living conditions of Jose’s family did not permit adequate postoperative and palliative care. The house was constructed of plastic sheets and plywood, had a dirt floor, electricity borrowed from a neighbor and no running water. Jose returned to our home after surgery and was met by an outpouring of love by the children, employees and volunteers. Despite being blind due to the tumor he delighted in holding our infants and caressing them. He remained with us for several months but when it became apparent that the disease was running its inexorable course and Jose was near death we feared the traumatic effect his passing would have on the other children. We spoke with his mother and she agreed to take him home. Both she and we felt that the best place for Jose to die was at home surrounded by his adoring siblings. Jose’s earthly life came to an end on April 13. We helped the mother with a casket and burial plot and, until she can return to some semblance of work and support her other children, we will furnish the family with food.
All children are gifts but some stand out more than others. Jose was such a child. His irrepressible smile, endearing manner and willingness to assist any child that needed help will forever edify those of us who cared for and loved him. The dedication of his mother, who despite unsurmountable economic difficulties, did everything in her power to serve her son and other children, is an example to be emulated and never to be forgotten.
Again, the question arises, “Why?” Why should a beautiful, giving child be subject to suffering and leave behind a grieving family and those who had come to love him? We will never know the answer this side of heaven but we do know that he was given to us as a gift. He taught us unconditional love and how to die to ourselves as we served him. He became the center of our lives and made us abjure our false selves. He made us descend to the center of our being, there to find God. Since Jose was made in the image and likeness of God, as we are, we and God suffered with Jose. A short but very fruitful life, a life whose purpose was to show us that wealth, power, and prestige have no comparison to love and service.
The mystery of God’s love is not that our pain is taken away, but that God first wants to share that pain with us. Out of this divine solidarity comes new life. Jesus’ being moved in the center of His being by human pain is indeed a movement towards new life. God is our God, the God of the living. In the divine womb of God, life is always born again. The truly good news is that God is not a distant God, a God to be feared and avoided, a God of revenge, but a God who is moved by our pains and participates in the fullness of the human struggle.
Nenri J.M. Nouwen
Our other children on these pages also grieve the loss of Jose. Due to the COVID-19 crisis there were no goodbyes and no special mass celebrated in the home as we have done for our other children who have passed from this life to the next. Due to the COVID-19 quarantine only emergency medical care is permitted which means that our children must wait until the quarantine is lifted to receive the care they came for.
One of our volunteers, Liana Lee, put together a video of Jose. Please log onto https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hCtSvwpk2Sc to witness the joy Jose brought into our lives and the lives of the children.
We thank you for enabling us to care for Jose and his family and for supporting our children. We love you and wish you God’s peace.
